🔥Girls Guide to Good Sex: Good Sex is Your Responsibility🔥

That’s right, ladies, having good sex is in your hands! Not only do you choose who you have sex with you also choose how good it is! In concert with sizzling chemistry you have the ability to make each sexual encounter a hot one! Hopefully, your partner has some skills that’ll make your body quake and your eyes roll back in your head!
 Let’s take your lover’s skill out of the equation for a moment. If you want to have hot passionate mind blowing sex you need to be a good lover.
Here are some tips to being a good lover:
•Love Your V: The female anatomy is complex and you need to know how you operate before you can expect a man to understand how to traverse the confusing and sometimes intimidating pussy.  A great book to read: “She Comes First” by Dr. Kerner…he knows what’s up and lays it out!
•Are You Wet?: Know what you need to get in the mood. Do you need a romantic set up? Have a connecting conversation before undressing? Need to make out for awhile to get comfortable? Watch porn? Whatever it is, do it!
•Skills in the Sack: No Pillow Princesses here! Know what you’re doing and be an active participant! Have some sensual tricks up your sleeve! Educate yourself by reading and watching videos about pleasing yourself and your lovers.
•Open Your Legs….and Mind: Be willing to experiment and to learn from your lover! You don’t know till you try… So try it you might like it!
•Let Go So You Can Come: Sex and sexual satisfaction is mental not physical! Let go of the insecurities, shame and fear! Get out of your head and into your body! Don’t be afraid to seek professional help with past traumas and current difficulties. Read: “Come as you are” by Emily Nagoski, Ph. D. to understand more about the psychology behind these mental blocks.
•Feeling Yourself: When you feel sexy, you ARE sexy! Most guys are thrilled just to be having sex, so quit worrying about how you look! Men love it when women enjoy sex and are satisfied!
•Talk Dirty to Him: Look, men aren’t mind-readers! They might not be able to translate your movement or moans. They need feedback, verbal feedback! Do you like it? Does he need to do something different? If details or instructions are too difficult, take baby steps and use positive reinforcement. “Oh, I like when you…..”. Remember to speak up when you’re being hurt or are uncomfortable.
•Oh God…oh god!!!: Did you know you can have different types of orgasms? Know how you can get yourself off and be open to exploring other orgasms with your partner. When you know what it takes you can make it happen and communicate what you need to your partner. Remember, masterbation is  beautiful and necessary to having a satisfying sex life.
If you want to be a good lover and have amazing sex you already have all of the tools to make it happen! Your mind and body are a work of art. Appreciating art is open, free, and an experience of the senses. To be mindful and present during sex is something that many of my clients struggle with, when they finally let go, the fireworks went off! SEXY is in your hands! Be yourself….There is nothing sexier.

🖤Not Feeling Someone?! How to End it Early Without Ghosting.🖤

Butterflies in your stomach, nonstop thinking of them, checking your phone to see if they texted, recalling everything they said and did on your last date….You know that feeling when you’re into a person you just started dating! You’re so excited, right?!
Well, what if you’re not feeling someone you’re dating…what then?!
This is when ghosting sounds like a great idea. It would be much easier to just disappear, suddenly having a family emergency, a huge project at work or a sick pet than to have a convo.
But, being on the other end of ghosting and lame excuses just plain sucks.
Of course, we don’t want to hurt anyone. But, stringing them along will probably hurt them more then being honest and upfront. The sooner you end it, the less it will hurt them.
Let’s be better daters. Let’s take the higher road. Communicate lovingly, directly and authentically.
Here’s how to break it off kindly:
-Do be gentle and pretty honest. I like using an old leadership tip, “two strokes for one poke”. For every one negative you can say two positive to lessen the blow.
-Don’t go for the jugular and say something like, “I think you’re super boring. I don’t find you attractive and will never sleep with you.”
-Don’t say things you don’t want or mean. “Maybe if something changes I’ll let you know” OR “I’m not looking for anything serious right now.”
-Don’t give mixed signals. “You’re a really great person but work is crazy busy and I just don’t have time.” You’re saying that you’re interested but don’t have time.
-Do put the shoe on the other foot. Think about how you’d like to receive that kind of news. That will help you communicate with kindness.
Try something like this:
“Hey ______, It’s important to me to be upfront and honest out of respect for you and myself. You are a real gentleman. Although, I enjoyed spending time with you I’m not interested in exploring this any further. Thank you for understanding. I know It sounds super cliche, but I do wish you well! Take care and be well. Sincerely, ______”
It’s better to get it over with so you and the other person can move on to bigger and better things!
Need help?! Contact me for quick and effective dating advice with my Dating 911 service!
Now, get out there and love each other.

Men – Here Are 7 Things You Should Know When Dating a Girl Who Loves Yoga

Ah, the revered yoga girl. You’ve seen her out sipping chai tea, sporting her booty-hugging Lululemons with her messy post-yoga hair. She appears light and breezy with an air of sensuality.

Even though you’re thinking about what you could do with her flexible body, she’s much more than a pretty asana. Before you embark on this spiritual endeavor, or just try to get her out of her yoga pants, there are some things you should know.

Here Are 7 Things You Should Know Before Dating a Yoga Girl

Yoga girls are definitely a unique breed that stand apart from the rest. At the same time, yoga girls are just like everyone else. They tend to get stereotyped a lot, so check out the facts you should know . . .

1. She’ll Want to Know Everything

Look, yoga girl wants to get real with you. She wants to know about your life, challenges, dreams, hopes, fears, and more. She doesn’t have time for small talk, games, or any other bullsh*t. Keep it 100 with her whether it’s a hookup or a LTR (Long Term Relationship). Go deep (conversationally, of course) or go home.

2. She’ll Ask: “Do You Yoga, Bruh?”

If you’re not already unrolling your mat and striking your best Warrior II, yoga girl will encourage you to do so. She wants you to experience all the amazing benefits yoga has to offer and be part of her sacred practice. The Spiritual Goddess wants her Spiritual King. She’s looking for her spiritual match.

When you’re ready to join your yoga girl, you’ll need yoga pants too! We’ve got you covered. Read Guys Need Yoga Pants Too – 10 High Performance Yoga Leggings for Men

3. She’s A Queen, Hold the Drama

Even though yoga girl might be a recovering hot mess, this yogini does her spiritual self-work. She’s composed and in control of her emotional state. She’s not going to lose her cool, gossip about others, or start sh*t with you.

If you f*ck around with her and take advantage of her, you’ll find yourself unfollowed, unfriended, deleted and blocked from her life. Disclaimer: she is still imperfectly perfect, and will lose it from time to time.

4. She’s Feeling Herself

Yoga girl has taken a good look at herself. She is aware of her emotional and physical strengths and weaknesses. She embraces and celebrates her mind, body, and soul. She’s rocking everything from her curvaceousness and sassy attitude to her beautiful mind.

Though her confidence is unwavering, she will humbly tell you she’s a work in progress and might occasionally enjoy checking out her booty in the mirror.

5. She’ll Need You to Shut the Hell Up

Gentlemen, don’t say any variation of, “Wow, I bet you’re flexible.” Just don’t. She’s already heard it from every guy who finds out she’s a yoga girl. When a dude hears a girl does yoga, he immediately wonders about the probability of her doing the splits on top of him. Don’t be a d*ck.

6. You’ll Have to Get Used to Unfamiliar Terms

Chakras, universe, asana, and energy are some terms you’re gonna have to get used to hearing if you’re going to date a yoga girl. She has a sacred outlook on life, and will communicate in terms you may or may not have heard before.

She might do or say things that weird you out. Perhaps you see her meditation spacefull of crystals https://www.yogiapproved.com/life-2/5-healing-crystals/, tarot cards, spiritual deities, sage and other exotic objects. Just roll with it . . . you might just learn something and enjoy yourself.

7. You’re Gonna Catch All the Feels

Yes, she’s been hurt and dragged through the mud a couple times! But yoga girl keeps her heart chakra open for the right people. She is particular about whose energy she’s around. If you have a good aura, she might just let you into her world.

Yoga girl isn’t scared to catch feelings for the right spiritual warrior, but if you have a “feels phobia” you can keep your asana away. On the flip side, if you’re ready to experience some magic, step right up!

Get Ready! Dating a Yoga Girl is Magical

Gentlemen, yogini’s are a special breed. If you treat your yoga girl like a goddess, she will treat you like a king. She might even balance your chakras in the process!

Remember what the late great Bob Marley said, “If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy. If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she’s worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy.”

Namaste!

Don’t Pinch Me

I haven’t always been the confident and self loving person I am today. Once upon a time, I was much more fit, extremely obsessed with my body and put too much energy and emphasis on my appearance.

Simply put….I had some issues!

A man in my life at the time knew I was ridiculous about my bodily obsession. He knew me better than most people. He knew that the most beautiful parts of me were not my rock hard abs but my beautiful intellect, wild spirit and tender loving heart.

Instead of simply saying I was over the top about my body & my weight he took action.

He’d pinch me.

He’d pinch the fattest parts of my body- on a daily basis! Sometimes he’d say, “I love it”….sometimes he’d say nothing at all and sometimes he’d say something like, “Jessica, you’re beautiful, you’ve got a hot body. You could gain 30 pounds and I wouldn’t notice because it doesn’t fucking matter.”

I fucking hated it!

It made me mad.

I felt embarrassed that someone noticed my imperfections that I was so desperately trying to hide while I fixed them.

He’d just chuckle. He knew it drove me crazy but he also knew he had to keep it up to drive his point home.

Thankfully, it worked.

Years later, I’m a completely different woman valuing myself, my worth and body from a much healthier, compassionate and REAL perspective.

Sure I still have moments that I’m concerned about my appearance but overall I live by the words of Dr Seuss, “Those who mind, don’t matter. And those who matter, don’t mind”.

When I date….I want a man to pinch me, to know my body tight and jiggly, to see me with no makeup….to know the good and the not so good parts of me.

Because, it’s who I am. I’d rather have men know the real me and have them decide if they like me or not than the be fake and have them be head over heels in love with a facade.

My love life has never been better!

I am eternally grateful to this man!

Need Help Feeling confident and sexy?! I won’t pinch you but I can help!

CLICK HERE to Visit my Dating Coaching Page

“Hook Up Crazies” aka Oxytocin Crazies

Jessica Smith

“Hook Up Crazies” aka Oxytocin Crazies

Ladies, ever wonder why you feel so into a guy and crazy about him after hooking up…regardless if he’s great or not?!
Men, ever wonder why ladies change after  sex?
In this video I’ll explain from a hormonal perspective what happens to women after they have sex. Shedding light on why they feel into a guy and a little crazy after the act. Sometimes good crazy and sometimes bad crazy!

 Need help navigating the oxytocin Crazies?! Click here to schedule a Dating 911 session for immediate help! Or better yet, let’s makeover your love life with my VIP Dating Makeover Intensive!❤️

🇯🇲I love you, Jamaica🇯🇲


I fell in love with Jamaica three years ago when I first stepped off the plane and heard the locals say, “Welcome home”. I know they say that to everyone but those words spoke to my heart.❤️ The relaxed vibe, the beautiful and friendly people, the amazing food, white sand beaches and turquoise water are some of my favorite things. It’s also the fact that I can just be myself there….nobody really cares who you are, what you look like, what you do….I can just be. ❤️

Are you Dating a King or a Prince?

To determine if you’re dating a King or a prince, ask yourself,  is he a “ME” or a “WE” type of guy?
“ME” is the mindset and attitude of the archetypal  Prince or Princess. They need attention, praise, validation, exploration and training. Their primary concern is about themselves and their own needs….It’s all about ME….what’s good for ME and what “I” want.
“WE” is the mindset and attitude of the archetypal King or Queen. They don’t need attention, praise, validation, exploration and training like the Prince/Princess does. They know who they are. They know their worth. They don’t need to be told they’re great, they know it. They know it’s about the collective, not just about them. They take into account everyone’s needs. They make sure it’s a Win Win ….It’s not ME, it’s WE.
The mindset shifts from ME to WE when we move from girl to Woman, princess to Queen, boy to Man and prince to King. 👑
Who’s dating a king? 

Men: 7 Things You should Know When Dating A Yoga Girl

Ahhh, the revered yoga girl. You’ve seen her out sipping chai, sporting her booty hugging Lululemons with her messy post yoga hair. She appears light and breezy with an air of sensuality. Even though, at the forefront of your mind you’re thinking about what you could do with her flexible body, she’s much more than a pretty asana. Before you embark on this spiritual endeavor or just try to get her your yoga pants there are some things you should know.
  1. No More Frauds.
    • Look, yogini’s want to get real with you. She wants to know about your life, challenges, dreams, hopes, fears, intellect…she doesn’t have time for small talk, games or any other bullshit. Keep it 100 with her no matter if its just a hook up or a LTR (Long Term Relationship). Go deep or go home.
  2. Do You Yoga, Bruh?
    • If you’re not unrolling your mat and striking your best Warrior II….You’re probably going to be encouraged to do so. She wants you to experience all the amazing benefits yoga has to offer and be part of her sacred practice.  The spiritual goddess wants her spiritual King. She’s yearning for her spiritual match.
  3. A Queen without the Drama.
    • Even though she might be a recovering hot mess this yogini has been doing her spiritual self work. She’s more composed and in control of her emotional state. She’s not going to lose her cool, gossip about others and start shit with you. You fuck around with her and take advantage of her equanimous aka Unfuckwithable nature, you’ll find yourself unfollowed, unfriended, deleted and blocked from her life.  Disclaimer: she is still imperfectly perfect feminine and will lose it from time to time.
  4. Feeling Herself.
    • This girl has taken a good look at herself. She is aware of her emotional and physical strengths and weaknesses. A Yogini embraces and celebrates her mind, body and soul. From her level of curvaceousness , sassy attitude, beautiful mind and not so sexy parts of her. Though her confidence is unwavering, she will humbly tell you she’s a work in progress and might occasionally enjoy checking out her own booty in the mirror.
  5. Hush Your Mouth.
    •  Gentlemen, don’t say, “Wow, I bet you’re flexible”. Just don’t. She’s heard it from almost every guy she’s mentioned that she practices yoga to. When men hear that a girl does yoga, they think about the probability of her legs behind her head or doing the splits on top of him. Don’t be a douche. However, if you are blessed enough to find yourself in the Goddess’s bed then a, “Wow, yoga has really paid off for you” wouldn’t be a terrible idea!
  6. Woo Woo Alter!
    • Chakras, universe, asana, energy are some terms you’re gonna have to get used to hearing if you’re going to date this divine diva. She has a sacred look on life and will communicate in this manner. She might do or say things that weird you out. Perhaps you see her meditation space full of crystals, tarot cards, spiritual deities, sage and other exotic objects. Just roll with it….you might just learn something and enjoy yourself.
  7. Catching Feels.
    • Yes, she’s been hurt, broken hearted and dragged through the mud a couple times! Yet, she keeps her heart charka open for the right people. She is discerning about who’s energy she’s around. If your aura is good she might just let you into her world. She’s not scared to catch feelings for the right spiritual warrior. If you have a “feels phobia” you can keep your asana away. But if you’re ready to experience some magic, step your Shiva self over here.
Gentlemen, yogini’s are a special breed….You treat her like a Goddess, she will treat you like a King and she might balance your chakras in the process! Remember what the late great, Bob Marley, said, “If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy. If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she’s worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy.”

Watch the official Trailer for LEAP

watch leap

Jessica is excited to be featured in the new coaching movie Leap. The movie documents how coaching transforms lives. Watch the emotional journey of these brave participants who take a leap to discover their true potential, overcome their biggest fears, and much more!